my job.

I do not want to go to work today, I feel sick. Aunt flow sucks. The end.

Get off your moms titts, you’re too old.

I am all for loving and caring for your mom, even a sort of mama’s boy is acceptable. I love my mother we are very close.  Most of my childhood memories are with my mom and I love that. The line is crossed from being okay to obsessive and weird, and that line for me is the minute you let your mom kiss you on the lips in front of your significant other. When I saw that, I didn’t know weather to be mad or feel sorry for him when I see things like this. When is the time to establish boundaries with your mother? Me and my mom have had a rocky ride, from when I was 13-15 my mother had a drug addiction and in an abusive relationship with the worst guy our family could ever encounter. He also attempted to abuse me at times, but I was stronger than that. I didn’t need or have a guy to make me who I was. Eventually, child services revoked my moms custody of me and awarded my pawpaw (my dad had an alcoholic addiction) so at first it was difficult. After she got rehab twice and leaved him for good, she apologized and opened up too me and aside from the usual you used up my moose (that happened today) and hairspray (that too) we’re okay.

Jess and his mother is a vague relationship, she does baby him way too much and talk to him like he’s a baby. Jess just lets her do that and doesn’t say much about it (notice that about him yet). When we first started dating she was a lot worse than what she is now but probably because we moved away from her. I remember one time Jess and I got into an argument and she flipped out on me and said she’d kick my ass and I just laughed. She never could fully accept me as apart of him, seems like she still sees me as the “other woman.” She also doesn’t like that fact that I speak my mind. Jess says that she has her good and bad moments, but he thinks its bullshit that she babies him, but she never listens. Then again, I can’t trust much he says while he’s watching Family Guy. Side note: I had a long day at work let me tell you I need some relaxation let me tell you!

I hope I don’t  act like an overbearing mother to Brenden, so far I don’t think so but he’s only 1.  I hope I can be a cool mom yet a stern one as well. He loves my mom and he doesn’t know Jess mother that well since we moved away when he was 4 months old. All I know is that, being a mother myself is great! Its also good to know that my mom is here to help me and see how great of a mom I am to my son!

 

The Mr. and his in-laws

As promised, I would post about my husband and his family. This morning we (baby, me, and hubby) went for a walk just to get some fresh air and by 9:30am Texas heat had already kicked my butt. I’ve been trying to be a bit healthier since I had a complicated pregnancy (preeclampsia) and I believe it was because I’m overweight. My husband and I met on a social site, not Facebook, and we immediately lived together which wasn’t the best idea but obviously we work well. I’ve been with him for 2 1/2 years now and we’ve obviously had our problems, but what couple hasn’t?

He’s all in all a great guy and he’s also your guys guy which I love! He loves me because I can be girly but also tomboy-ish at the same time and apparently that’s sexy. Before we met, he was married and filing for divorce from his ex-wife named Sylvia. They have a son together named Jayden and he’s 3 as of June 2011. I’ve only met him once because me and his mom don’t see eye to eye on parenting styles. Anyways, I’ve gotten one too many different stories from people including my husband so I just stick to his story which is that he accidentally got her pregnant, they decided to get married, she threw a fit to her dad for him to financially support them instead of Jess (hubby), problems started happening, she cheated a lot, and he had enough and left.

Now I don’t know if that’s the full truth or not, but at this point its the past. His family liked her a lot, and when they found out I came into the picture just 3 months after they filed for divorce it wasn’t pretty at all. His mom ignored me at first, and his oldest sister talked to me a bit, and his youngest sister ignored me as well.  I just brushed it off because I did understand where they were coming from because I was just a strange girl. After the divorce was finalized, Jess had a lot of problems with visitation because she had a lawyer accusing Jess of not being a fit “human being” because he’s diagnosed with bi-polar disorder that he is on medication for. I thought that was ridiculous and I still think that because I have complete trust in him as a father, he’s great! As a result, he had to go through a center and pay a monthly fee to have visitation at some church where someone was watching them as well as a camera. He hated that, and felt like he couldn’t have a full relationship with his son.

The first big fight I got into was with his oldest sister, Alisha. We were all living together with a friend, her 3 kids, her boyfriend, me, and Jess. One night the friend got wasted so bad that he wanted to create drama. I was against this idea the whole time, but Jess was on board 100%. They got into the car and picked up a street sign and put it in Alisha’s truck as a joke of some sort. She was asleep and her boyfriend was at work (he worked at the jail), but when he got home at 5am with one of his co-workers dropping him off he saw what was in the truck, and he was pissed! He immediately told us to get that out of his truck, but because I had nothing to do with it, I ignored him and went back to sleep. Well, he kept running his mouth and kept on but I still ignored him. Once he was asleep, I woke up and was getting ready for work and saw that the street sign was on MY CAR! I flipped out and woke him up and proceeded to get “ghetto” with him (when I’m mad I go all out and roll my neck and everything) telling him to quit being an immature dick and get that shit off my car, but he didn’t. Jess eventually took it off my car, and the friend is still passed out, and as we were walking back inside, her boyfriend felt the need to get out of his room and stand on the porch and I once again ignored him. He didn’t want to ignore me, and called me a whore. Now its one thing to call a whore a whore, but its another thing to question an honest girl with honest feelings for her guy and would never cheat or do anything inappropriate to jeopardize my relationship with Jess. I said to him, “DON’T YOU EVER FUCKING CALL ME THAT YOU PIECE OF SHIT!!! I MOVED 400 MILES AWAY FROM EVERYONE TO BE WITH THIS GUY AND HOW DARE YOU SAY THAT KIND OF SHIT TO ME WHEN I HAVEN’T DONE SHIT! DON’T GET BUTT HURT JUST BECAUSE ALISHA’S ONLY USING YOU SO SHE DOESN’T HAVE TO FUCKING WORK!!!!!!” Jess just stood to the side and said nothing to defend me, and he heard her boyfriend call me a whore. After that, all hell broke lose and by that time I was over this drama and just wanted to go back home. Alisha wanted to run her mouth too, but all I was worried about was why wasn’t this guy that I love not defending me? Why wasn’t he being supportive or doing anything for that matter? I was really upset about that because I did drop my entire life in Fort Worth, and move 400 miles to Odessa for him, and when something like calling me a whore happened I thought the right thing to do was to defend your girl and say “no she’s not so leave her alone,” but no all I got was silence. I didn’t care who else was around or fighting, I was immediately chewing him out.

Eventually, I got over it with Jess but to this day I still don’t get a full complete honest answer to a lot of questions I still question. Should I still be doing this? Most of all, why do guys do this? They want you to be honest with them so why can’t they just be blunt with us as well.  Tomorrow I’ll be talking about my other sister-in-law Nikkitta (or Nikki) and about how she’s just a typical annoying teenager.

Here I go

First of all, hello to all who reads this. My first post here is going to be about me and why I chose to start this. When it came to relationships, I was the girl who always was in one. There were times I hated it, but having someone in my life in that sort of way was a sort of addiction. I finally found my own independence once I was married, and that’s only the beginning. I was dating my husband and we had a small one bedroom apartment, all was well. He worked a lot and I went to college and stayed home, we both loved not having a child around and it was just us.

Around Thanksgiving, I found out I was pregnant and I was afraid at first but I warmed up too it later on. Due to the economy, my husband lost his job back in October so we’re currently living at my parents house. I work for a company where I make random calls across the country and beg them to take a “quick” survey which is an okay job aside from the old people and the angry people.  I also am still in college full time to get my BA and become a special education teacher. My husband is not working, still looking for a job so he feels like his manhood has been snatched away from him. My parents house sucks!

My mother and father are separated but living in the same house and in different bedrooms. My dads a drunk and a workaholic, but can’t seem to find a way to get my husband a job at his bakery. I have two older brothers one is 31 and a workaholic that I never see and he has one daughter and 2 step daughters. My second brother is 30 and has a whopping 6 children all bad, and he is also a low life “wigger” I know its harsh but come on he has a good job but manages to ask my father for money every Wednesday. My grandfather (pawpaw) lives 5 blocks from us, and he’s 87 years old as of May 2011. He was in WW2 and had many experiences and stories to tell, but never get him on religion or politics. He is a straight up republican, so he can sometimes be a handful. Now a little bit about myself, I am 20 years old and I was always spoiled by everyone. If you tell me I can’t do something, I will prove you wrong every time. I am also not afraid to say what’s on my mind and everyone else. I love to relax and watch the good movies not the crappy kind like my current favorite that I recently saw was Harry Potter and the Deathly Hollows part 2. It delivered. I am also into indie/regge music and I also listen to what’s on the radio. My favorite artist is Adele, she has this great outlook on being who you are and not what society tells us to be. I am also a big girl, and I do not care I love my fat. I’m a great mother as well, I see my son everyday which most mothers my age cannot say. I love baseball, I’m a die hard Rangers fan (runner up team is Red Sox) I do not follow any other sport but baseball. I was a softball pitcher for 6 years and was going to college for it, but I got pregnant.

My husband and his family is too much to handle for one post so that will be my next post and how he was first married at 16 and his family actually approved it, and how that crumbled and how we met, and lastly my first fight with my sister-in-law. I truly hope you keep up and I love and appreciate feedback both good and bad! Hope all have a good Monday!